Chapter 84

"Do you smell smoke?" Tom Nesbitt asked his wife.

"Yes," said Tracy. "I already checked the kitchen and the iron."

"It doesn't smell like barbecue," Tom said, looking out the window. "Is that the inversion or is it smoky outside?"

"Sirens!" John yelled as he ran past his parents to yank open the front door.

Abby and Davey joined John on the porch as their parents crowded out behind them to see a fire engine and ladder truck turn up their street. More neighbors started pouring onto their porches as a couple of pickup trucks with water tanks in the truck beds followed the big fire trucks.

"Come on! Let's see where they're going!" John yelled, and took off up the street after the fire trucks.

"John! Get back here and stay out of their way!" Tom shouted after his son.

John was already out of earshot.

"That's where they're going," Tracy said, pointing up the hillside. Black smoke billowed up from behind the large homes that were less than two years old.

"I'm going to go talk to Ruth," Abby said, running to join her friend. She and Ruth started walking up the street with several other people from the neighborhood, wanting to know what was going on.

Tom and Tracy met Brian and Maria Anderson on the front sidewalk. Their younger daughter, Hannah, was clinging to her mother and crying.

"Do you think we should go offer to help?" Tom asked.

"They'd probably just tell us to stay out of the way," Brian answered.

"Is her house going to burn down, mom? Is Kennedee's house going to burn down?" Hannah asked.

"The fire trucks are already there," Maria told her daughter.

"The Bakers have that problem with their retaining wall," Tom said to no one in particular.

"We may as well go join the crowd," Tracy said.

The five of them walked up the street, around the corner, and then up the street that led to the cul-de-sac of expensive homes on the hillside. They were stopped by the crowd of neighbors watching the firefighters.

"They're lucky there isn't any wind today," someone commented.

Even without the wind, Tom could feel the heat from the wildfire. The air above the flames was shimmery with heat waves that rose up to the smoke. The entire hillside wasn't ablaze, just the portion behind the Baker's house, their neighbors' on either side, and the empty lot. The dry brush and weeds went up like tinder. The fire truck was laying down a wet line between the residences and the wildfire while the brush units in the pickup trucks fought the actual blaze.

"Do they know what started it?" someone was asking.

"Maybe it was a lightning strike," someone else guessed.

"In this perfect weather?" Tom pointed out.

"Probably kids playing with matches," Brian guessed.

"Dumb kids," come a comment from somewhere.

"Kennedee likes to play camper," Hannah told Maria.

"The little Baker girl?" Tom asked.

"Hannah's friend," Brian confirmed.

"She's always really careful when we play campfire," Hannah said.

"Were you playing campfire today?" Maria asked her, alarmed.

Hannah shook her head. "Not me. But Kennedee likes to play campfire."

Tom whistled. "Bad place to play campfire."

More sirens came screaming up the street, and the crowd of onlookers moved to the sidewalks to let another pickup truck with a water tank get past.

"Have they evacuated everyone, do you think?" Tracy asked.

Sister Nixon, the Relief Society President, came up behind her. "I just got off the phone with Sister Baker. They aren't being evacuated unless the wind picks up. She said the Battalion Chief has been talking to them and doesn't think they need to leave yet. She was also afraid that her daughter, Kennedee, started the fire."

"Poor kid. I bet she's scared to death," Brian commented.

"What can we do to help?" Maria asked.

"Nothing, right now," Sister Nixon answered. "We'll keep in touch, but with some luck and a prayer, the fire won't get any closer to the house than it is right now."

"Those little trucks sure carry a lot of water," Brian said. "Look at that spray."

"Looks like they're making progress," Tom said. "Or at least it doesn't look like it's spreading any further. I bet they contain it and then let it burn itself out."

"Hey, dad, can we go up on the hillside where we can see better?" John asked, popping up with his friend, Jared Call.

"No, you don't go anywhere near that hillside. Stay out of their way," Tom answered.

"We'll stay on that side of the fire," John explained, pointing to an area that had already burned.

"Your dad said no," Tracy told him.

Jared elbowed him. "Let's go see if Dylan will let us in his house, instead. We can watch the fire from his bedroom window."

"They've got enough to worry about. Stay here," Tom said.

The neighbor crowd ebbed and flowed throughout the rest of the afternoon. Some of the children raided their pantries and brought cookies and juice boxes, setting up a picnic on the lawns as they watched the fire. As evening came, the firefighters defeated the fire, and the smoke turned into steam as they drenched the embers, leaving a blackened hillside. Everyone lined the street and applauded as the fire trucks drove away.

---

"Sister Merrit," Tracy Nesbitt called out, winding through the crowds of people chatting in the foyer after Church.

Monica Merrit turned around.

"Thanks so much for letting us borrow your flags for the ward's Pioneer Days activity," Tracy said. "I've got them in my garage. We can bring them over later today if you'll be home."

"We'll be home. I'm sorry we couldn't stay and help clean up after the activity. We could have taken the flags home and saved you the trip," Monica said.

"Not at all! Wasn't Craig participating in a parade?" Tracy asked.

"Yes, there were six veterans from Craig's unit in the parade, five from Afghanistan and one who served in Iraq a year earlier, plus two Vietnam veterans. It was really neat. Craig held Jackson on his lap the whole time," Monica said, nuzzling the neck of her baby, who laughed and wound his hands into her hair. "Jackson loved it. He's such a ham! Craig said he waved at people through the entire parade route."

"That must have been fun for both of them," Tracy said, patting Jackson's back. "We sure appreciate everything your husband does for our country."

"Thanks," Monica said. "I'm sure glad he's home."

"Did you see the fire yesterday?" Tracy asked her.

"Who didn't? That was scary, wasn't it? Everyone on that street was so lucky that there wasn't any wind," Monica said.

"Let's go, mom," John said, appearing at Tracy's side, swinging his scripture case around.

"Be careful. You're going to hit somebody with those," Tracy told him. She turned back to Monica. ""We'll be over later today with the flags."

"Those were cool!" John said. "Did you see the fire? We should have put out the flags again for the firefighters! Me and Jared are going to go up after Church and see everything that burned. Dylan said he was going to show us where his sister started the fire. She's grounded for the whole rest of her life. Maybe she'd autograph a box of matches for me. Mom, if I sell a box of matches on eBay, would you mail it for me?"

Monica started laughing. Tracy just shook her head.

"Are we leaving yet?" Abby said, joining her mom and brother.

"Hey! I want a cupcake!" John said.

"Too bad. I got it in class," Abby said, shielding her cupcake from her brother.

"Are you going to share?" Davey asked his sister.

"No," said Abby.

"Dad! Make her share!" Davey wailed.

"It's Abby's treat," Tom answered. "We've got cookies and candy at home."

"After you eat lunch," Tracy added.

"After lunch," Tom agreed.

"That's not fair Abby gets a cupcake," John grumbled.

"It was part of our lesson," Abby said, as the five of them left the air conditioned foyer behind for the summer heat and the walk home.

"My teacher doesn't teach about cupcakes," Davey said. "She teaches about Joseph Smith."

"Our teacher says we're like cupcakes, and if we break the law of chastity, that's like having your frosting licked off, and no one wants to eat a cupcake if someone else licked off the frosting. You have to keep the law of chastity or else no one will marry you," Abby said, licking the frosting.

"I'd still eat a cupcake if someone licked off the frosting," John said.

"You would," Abby said with withering scorn.

"Your teacher said what?" Tracy demanded.

"That keeping the law of chastity is like keeping your frosting. The law of chastity means you never do anything until after you're married, because otherwise no one wants you. I mean, you can repent and get new frosting, but it's still a cupcake someone slobbered on," Abby said.

"Was this in Sunday School or Young Women's?" Tracy asked. Tom put a hand on her arm. She shook it off.

"Young Women's," Abby answered, taking a bite of her cupcake.

"Calm down a bit," Tom said quietly, so the children wouldn't hear.

Tracy's lips had disappeared in a thin line. "Who was your teacher today?"

"Sister Campbell. I like her. Did you know her hair is naturally curly? I wish I had naturally curly hair," Abby said.

---

Tracy waited two hours before making the phone call. On Tom's advice, she called Sister Anderson first. Tracy didn't like confrontation at all, but this was too important to shrug and ignore.

"Hi, Maria. This is Tracy Nesbitt. How are you?"

"Fine, thanks. How are you? How is Abby liking Young Women's?"

"She loves it. She told me about the lesson today, and that's why I'm calling. I don't know how to say this, and I'm not usually the sort of person to call and say something went wrong. I'm really sorry. Abby loves Megan Campbell, and I'm sure she's the neatest person in the world. I don't want you to think I'm mad at anyone or anything, but I had to call," Tracy said, hoping that if she apologized enough it wouldn't sound like criticism.

"I didn't hear the Beehive lesson today," Maria said. "What happened?"

"I guess it sounds like the lesson was on the law of chastity. Megan brought one of those object lessons that go around sometimes. She brought cupcakes and said that keeping the law of chastity was like not getting the frosting licked off. Abby told me about it, so maybe she didn't phrase it exactly like that, but," Tracy said.

Maria interrupted her. "Those are terrible object lessons! Can you imagine how a girl who had been sexually assaulted or abused would feel if she had to hear something like that?"

Tracy was momentarily stunned into silence. "Exactly. Abby didn't think much of it, she was just happy to have a cupcake, but you never know what some of the other girls might have already gone through, or what might happen to them in the future."

"Tracy, thank you so much for telling me. I'll call Megan Campbell. I'm sure she simply didn't think about how that lesson might affect some girls. I'll probably teach another lesson to the Beehives next week. If you'd like to come to class with Abby, you're more than welcome to come. Perhaps you could provide some input."

"I don't think I'd have much to say," Tracy said, "but I could come listen."

"Whatever you're comfortable with," Maria said.

"Okay."

"Thanks again for calling, and for being so polite about it. It's nice to hear about a problem without getting a tongue-lashing along with it," Maria said.

"Oh, I could never do that," Tracy said.

"I know you couldn't. Abby is as sweet as you are. She and Ruth are so full of plans for Girls Camp this year," Maria said.

"Abby is already packing, then she unpacks and does it all over again," Tracy said.

"Do you have a small flowered suitcase with a daisy on the zipper?" Maria asked.

"Yes, do you need to borrow it?" Tracy asked.

"I think we already did. I saw it in Ruth's room and wondered where it came from," Maria said.

They both laughed and chatted about their daughters for a few more minutes before saying good-bye.

---

Maria hung up the phone after talking with Tracy Nesbitt and began wracking her brains to remember everything she'd ever said to the Young Women about the law of chastity. She pulled her binder out of her Sunday bag and thumbed through the tab for lesson notes. The new Personal Progress value, virtue, had been announced shortly before she'd been called as Young Women's President, and it seemed they'd talked of nothing else for months. Had she ever used an object lesson to teach chastity?

After paging through her notes, Maria satisfied herself that she hadn't personally used an object lesson to illustrate the law of chastity. She thumbed through the activities calendars for the past sixteen months, and didn't see anything. She flipped to the section in the binder about Girls Camp, which was stuffed full with plans for this year's camp. Last year's notes were a dog-eared wad of paper that looked like they'd been taken camping a year ago. There was the service project, and the craft project, and menus, and a list of the injuries and illnesses from last year. Alyssa's skinned knees were on the list, along with Keighlee's insistence she had acute appendicitis after getting into the camp store's stash of candy bars. Savannah's mild sore throat was on the list, and Danna's brief bout with stomach flu.

Danna had only thrown up once, her notes said, at the fireside when Brother Beale was speaking. She'd brought the entire evening to a screeching halt, which was a shame because all four of that evening's speakers spoke about virtue, and Brother Beale was the keynote speaker. In fact, Maria had been one of the speakers that evening. She kept thumbing and found her notes. She'd spoken about virtue, but there was nothing in her talk that looked like it would have hurt an assault victim. Naturally, she hadn't mentioned assault or abuse victims at all. She should have written down what the others had said. She vaguely remembered thinking that Brother Beale had given a powerful talk. Roses, she remembered. Brother Beale had used roses to teach the law of chastity. There were only two roses – the one that was pure and untouched, and the one that was manhandled and ugly. Danna hadn't had stomach flu after all.

Maria started to cry, thinking of how much that object lesson would have hurt Danna. Less than a year ago, Maria had thought it was a powerful teaching tool, and now she thought it was insensitive and clumsy. There was so much more to the law of chastity than being an untouched virgin or a repentant sinner. There had to be more. But for the life of her she couldn't think of what it was or how to teach it.

She didn't know what she would say if she taught a lesson to the Beehives next week on the law of chastity. But what if there was another girl like Danna in the Beehive class? Her breath caught. In four years, Hannah would be the girl in the Beehive class who needed to hear that there was more to the law of chastity than a cupcake could teach.

Besides the bits and pieces Brian shared with her about recovery, everything she'd ever heard about sexual abuse was about prevention, and her reporting responsibilities as a teacher. Beyond that was uncharted territory. Danna tried navigating it alone and gave up. Brian spent years adrift in despair and sin. Hannah had embarked two years ago on her own voyage, without even knowing that there was a farther shore to end her journey.

Maria didn't know how to help an abuse victim, although for Hannah's sake she was determined to learn. But at the very least, she could stop the object lessons in her ward and study out how to teach the law of chastity in a way that helped a secret, silent victim more than it hurt.

---

"Hi, Megan, this is Maria Anderson. How are you?"

"Fine, thanks," Megan Campbell answered. "Emma finally started nursery. It is so much easier to teach Young Women's without a little monkey climbing all over the classroom."

"I bet it is! I heard you brought cupcakes for your lesson today," Maria said.

"Yep. I couldn't have done that if Emma wasn't in nursery," Megan answered.

"You do a great job, Megan. I know how dedicated you are to your girls, and they love you. I wanted to ask you about your object lesson, though. I completely understand why you brought it. There are bunches of object lessons for teaching the law of chastity. But I've noticed that most of them emphasize never sinning in the first place. I'm afraid that it might chase away girls who feel like they've broken the law of chastity," Maria said.

"Oh no," Megan said, "we talked about repentance. I mean, we didn't talk about repentance much, because these are the twelve and thirteen-year-olds. We ought to be pushing prevention at this age, don't you think? It's better not to sin at all. But I did tell them they could repent and it's like getting new frosting."

"That's great. I'm still a bit concerned that the girls may get the incorrect idea that someone who has to repent is still never quite as good as a girl who never sinned at all. And of course, there are some girls who may be sexually abused, or even raped, who might think they're not as good as a girl who didn't go through those trials," Maria said.

"Well," Megan said slowly, "it is better not to sin than it is to sin and repent, that's pretty obvious. And as for people like victims, I don't think the lesson would have been a problem. I mean, they're as pure as anyone else, so it's not like they have to feel bad about what happened to them or worry they're not as good."

"A victim might still feel like she's not as good. She might feel that she has done something wrong," Maria said.

"Do you really think so? I didn't even think about how a victim might feel," Megan said.

"It's easy to overlook them," Maria said. "Victims keep quiet."

"I didn't even think about victims," Megan repeated. "I just thought the girls would be excited to get a cupcake."

"Would it be all right if I came to your class next week and talked to the girls a little bit about some of these issues?" Maria asked

"I suppose. But remember these are just little kids right now. I'm not sure I'd want someone talking to Emma about sexual abuse and rape when she's only twelve," Megan said.

Danna was twelve; Hannah was five; Brian was five; Rita was ten, Maria mentally listed.

"I'll make sure I speak appropriately for their age," Maria said.

"Okay," Megan said.

"It was good to talk to you," Maria said. "You do a great job, and I'm really looking forward to Girls Camp with you again this year."

Maria chatted with Megan about Girls Camp for a few minutes, and then said good-bye.

Next, she called the Young Women's Secretary to get the list of girls who had been in Beehives this week. If any of them didn't come next week, she wanted to speak to them personally.